The COR of Anni Roc

Still recovering from last week’s craziness. My fatigued neurons hungover from binge working, in that zone of zen where sleep deprivation and barely eating go hand in hand. Really believe I have slept probably only 10-15 hours last week consisting of 2 hour naps scattered about and meals of cinnamon bread and the occasional frozen dinner. And cans of guaraná laced Ballz, the only energy drink that seems to work on me. Maybe I’m going through guaraná withdrawal, hence the headaches.

occasio praeceps – “opportunity fleeting”

About a couple of weeks ago I walked into American Science and Surplus for a couple of things and saw the blazing bright neon orange sign that mentioned American Maker, a live show and tell event. It was taking place at the Museum of Science and Industry. It was by Make and Craft magazine. Publications that I admire and adore, yet rarely buy because I don’t want to overtax my lifetime list of projects. There was a $500 cash prize and being on the magazine. I knew I wasn’t going to win (who can compete with a human powered submarine?) yet I would love to be in those magazines. It’s like the equivalent of “Person of the Year” in Time for me.

I entered on a whim with the Das Kraftwerkkleid project, really didn’t believe I would be picked on such short notice. Entered that particular project because of the line, “Clothing with LEDs?” on the flyer, because my clothing lights up with el wire. So on that rain drenched weekend caused by Hurricane Ike, was shutted in and didn’t even start working on the project due to doubt. We had to keep an eye out on the apartment too because of extensive leaking due to roof repairs.

The words “occasio praeceps” kept ringing in my head. If I don’t try to enter or apply, then I’ll regret it and beat myself up. I was bummed out for not entering the Q101 Lollapalooza video contest, and missing some Instuctables contests such as the t-shirt hack and the glowing contest. Opportunity is fleeting so I took a chance.

experimentum periculosum – “experiment treacherous”

Das Kraftwerkkleid work in progress

After the rainy weekend I received an email that my project was picked. So only 5 days to improve what I have. Wanted to showcase a complete dress in its neon green and grey glory. The state it is in, the mesh was falling apart and needed to be replaced.  I couldn’t find the same exact mesh that I used before. It was softer and seemed to be more stretchy. Found a great substitute in a laundry hamper from cvs, and it was all the more appropriate that it was neon green to match. I considered it a happy accident.

Sally Stitch Dressform

Another fortunate accident was that I chatted with a woman about my project while picking up a mannequin.  She wanted to show it off at the shop for passersbys to see and also sold me a really old school dressform. She asked why I am not involved in theatre, it never occured to me to do so.  Never seen anything like it, a Sally Stitch dress form made of metal and paper. Used to seeing the plastic dressforms or the industrial type with collapsible shoulders that the pros use.

Before sewing unfamiliar materials, test sewings are always in order. Was happy with the results that the machine gave me but when it came time for the final assembly, the swimsuit fabric got stuck into the feed dogs. It was frustrating being crunch time and all but I knew that you cannot ever rush in there with vulnerable fingers because the machine will always win. Learned my 2nd lesson when I burned my left anterior forearm superior to the carpals, with an iron while reaching for something. My first one was I was rushing to get a sign done for the company I was working for at the time and cut my left distal index finger with the box cutter. I didn’t realize what happened until I saw a small bit of skin and blood on the pristine, white foamboard. When I reported it, my direct supervisor/manager got the others convinced to let me go to the hospital for a tetanus shot.
SAFETY FIRST. NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, RUSH.
That particular slicing finger lesson didn’t teach me well enough to avoid the hot iron though. Maybe because it didn’t leave a scar. Now there’s a iron burn mark as a reminder.

Sewing feed dogs eating fabric

So I’m working with the fabric eating Brother CS-8060 and the nightmare threading Consew 14TU5432 and I remembered “experimentum periculosum”. To experiment with the unfamiliar will have unexpected results which makes it all the more perilous. There’s a quote that I heard but I don’t know where it is exactly from, there’s no exact source, it’s just posted on many martial arts websites as a kung-fu principle or a Chinese proverb:

“It is better to avoid than to block,
It is better to block than to strike,
It is better to strike than to hurt,
It is better to hurt than to maim,
It is better to maim than to kill,
It is better to kill than to be killed,
All life is precious and none can be replaced”

-kung-fu principle

“Hurt rather than maim; maim rather than kill; and kill rather than destroy utterly.”

Not sure where I first heard it, just remembered it and it was in my head while working with the machines. And I’m thinking:

I would rather make one great piece of work than 2 mediocre pieces.
But
I would rather have a mediocre piece of work than my hands in pieces.

So this helped put my mind at ease while working. Yes it’s horrible that my vision is compromised but it’s either that or my health and safety. Ended up gluing the pieces together with Glue Pins because it’s temporary and water soluble. Upon examination, the sewing notion I was using, the Dritz Basting Tape was gumming up the process. Which is weird because it didn’t do that in previous tests and sewings. My guess is that the grey fabric was recently washed and it might still have moisture in the fibers and it affected the tape, melting it and then it started gumming up the needle. Still trying to figure out the best way to place blocks of jersey knit onto swimsuit knit fabric. With minimal seams showing and not using a serging flatlock stitch though might resort to that.

iudicium difficile – “judgment difficult”

We are all our own worst critics. Even though everyone was encouraging and approving after my presentation I’m embarrassed to death of my stage presence. I had it all thought out on my head, what to say, what to do, what music, video, slideshow. I was wishing that I explained my pseudonym, safety precautions, how I’d rather show a prototype rather than lose my fingers. Tried to prepare the night before to get used to the environment of the stage. Of course it all fell apart in my perfectionistic mind’s eye. Stumbled speeches, falling battery packs, forgotten stage props. Too embarrassed to look at my own video. Yes, I’m beating myself up (but I’m so good at it.)

Just because I’m genetically derived from a car salesman is no guarantee of my public presence. Just used to being in my workshed/officespace, toiling away and to be outside of that is so unsettling. I am better at one-on-one conversations than presenting to a mass of people. But unless I’m familiar with someone it’s sometimes also hard to talk to someone. Also used to a camera or film & video lens. My guess is that having a point of focus or visual reference whether it be a face or a lens helps me be grounded. But staring out there into a blankness, darkness, no wall, no point, hidden eyes is unnerving.

Link:
American Maker Flickr Photoset by Marc de Vinck,
Product Designer and MAKE blogger

It was the first time Make magazine did American Maker show and tell, and my first time presenting to the mainstream general public (Around the Coyote doesn’t count due to my absence.) Being out of the bubble of school and peers, need to adjust and adapt to these new conditions. So used to being in particular niche microcosms, not everyone knows about Burning Man or realize where the core influences or sources of a culture or music are. Learned a lot though, realized presentation in person is going to take as much work as R&D (research & development), preproduction, and assembly. Didn’t want to be tied down to a table or booth because I’m so tired of being crammed down in my workshed/officespace. Looking around though many people are interacting with the other displays. I brought my el wire designers’ kit but it was meant for the stage (which I forgot to demonstrate.) Everything went so fast and disorienting, somehow managed to be awake with one hour of sleep. Despite these setbacks, had a great time talking to little kids, it forced me to rethink my explanations. Seeing them excited over the work is wonderful to watch and very satisfiying.

During the craziness, a woman from the museum was looking for me so I can be interviewed by a writer who is writing a book or article about women inventors. Don’t know where I stand, I’m just making stuff, I dislike titles, they’re limiting. Once you christen yourself a title then people will primarily view you as such and not see the other facets of your capabilities. Guess some things I do are inventive but I see them artistically yet I don’t like being an artist per se because I make things and don’t really do fine art as much if ever. Even though I call myself a “multi-disciplinary artist”, what about designer? engineer? inventor? assembler? hacker? modifier? maker? creator? bricoleur? Dammit do I have to change my identity cards all over again? Maybe drop the title “artist” and convert it to “creator”? Or “bricoleur” sounds nicely exotic. “Jill-of-all-trades” is a common but tiresome moniker that I’m tired of using. Aware that many of the things I make aren’t the most absolute original stuff and it’s derived from other sources but it’s fun and it keeps the blues away. Also, being a female is an after thought, so is my cultural and racial background. More tomboy in girl clothes, don’t even know how to properly put on makeup at all. I just want to make stuff and show it and share my knowledge and findings that’s all.

Like my first audience experience with the Radiohead Bearsuit, this is a trial by fire (to use the terminology loosely X-p). In fact it’s pretty damn close to that experience because I was alone in the endeavor most of the time. Needed to fall this much so improvements can be made. Realized that this is the year I’m starting get out more away from my workshed/officespace (yes, it’s 2 movie references). I was a bit bummed out many people couldn’t make it but the whole thing was last minute and the museum is so far south and far away from Chicago north siders so it wasn’t surprising. Maybe it was a good thing because of the goof ups :p Pleasantly surprised and grateful one of my friends showed up last minute. Came up with more ideas after the show too, urgh like I need anymore of those ;-)

Well hopefully there’s more of this to come (without the awkwardness). It was great to meet other individuals that are DIY makers, another group to be aqcuainted with. Did wish I spent more time talking to them to learn more but it was an energenic and chaotic day to say the least. It was wonderful to meet the Make magazine folks and it was perfect that it was at the Museum of Science and Industry. Hopefully they’ll keep doing this and hopefully they’ll pick me again to present. Alas I don’t know if I’ll still be in Chicago by then but would love to participate as much as possible whereever I am in these events.